Monday, September 20, 2010

Mom & Gigi's visit

Many of you know that my Grandma has lung cancer. She is in hospice care now and she's chosen not to pursue any further treatment. Last week my mom called to see if her and Gigi could come out for a short visit (per the hospice nurse's recommendation) and of course I said yes! I quickly rearranged our schedules, made some phone calls, canceled some plans, and got really excited to see my mom and Gigi.

I have to be honest though, on the way to the airport I started to panic a little. When we left my parents house in July, I didn't have to say "goodbye" to Gigi.....instead, we said "see you later" and hoped for another visit maybe in January. It gave me a lot of relief to not have that pressure of saying "goodbye". Since July, Gigi's health has worsened and I knew that this visit would likely be "goodbye". I cried on the way to the airport and kind of started to dread the visit, and fearful of what I was going to have to face.

When we picked up Gigi and Mom, Gigi seemed pretty out of it. My grandma is sassy. She has an amazing sense of humor, thinks "The Office" is hilarious, and got Brett and I on into the dry humor of Christopher Guest's movies (Best in Show, Waiting for Guffman, etc.) Gigi was very quiet and sleepy. Apparently, she took an anti-anxiety medication on the plane to help with the flight and it left her very drugged. We took my mom, Gigi, and Ems home and then Brett and I ran to get some groceries. When we got home, Gigi had returned to a little more of a normal state which was a relief.

Immediately my sense of fear and anxiety over the visit ceased once I was able to get home and spend time with my mom and grandma. I am so grateful for the precious memories that we have created this weekend. We have been house bound for much of the visit, with one trip to Fred Meyers. :) I have been doing some baking and making some yummy homemade dinners for my family and it feels good.

For Emersyn's birthday, my friend Amancia gave her some paints and a canvas (along with a really cute T-Ball it!!). I decided to save the canvas for Gigi's visit and yesterday Emersyn and Gig created a masterpiece. I was very emotional, watching Ems and Gigi just enjoy each other so much. Emersyn truly loves her Gigi. Whenever Gigi leaves the room, Ems goes looking for her. She goes upstairs with my mom and helps get Gigi to bed. It's really precious. Brett pointed out to me that we are so lucky that Emersyn knows any of her great grandparents and we just need to reflect on that blessing. Still, it doesn't make it easy.

I have so enjoyed spending some quality time with my mom and grandma. My sweet Gigi has left quite a legacy. It's neat looking at four generations all in one room. My Gigi has always been a hands on grandma and I couldn't have asked for a better great grandma for my daughter. I want to write my Gigi a letter soon to express my love and appreciation for her but I need to emotionally prepare for that. It has been a draining couple of days,
just a lot to wrap my mind around.

I am so grateful for the hope and faith that I have. I know that my Gigi is going to heaven and that I WILL see her again, and for that I can find joy. Say a prayer if you think about it tomorrow afternoon when I take my mom and Gigi to the airport.

It's not a moment I am looking forward to.

"The LORD your God is with you,
He is mighty to save.
He will take great delight in you,
He will quiet you with his love,
He will rejoice over you with singing."
Zeph. 3:17


Kristi said...

I cried. I am praying for you and your family. XOXO

Melissa said...

oh, patti, that is so hard! I got all teary-eyed! :( I'm so sorry. I will be praying for you tomorrow & after that, too. HUGS!

Tyler said...

I am praying for you girl.. these type of situations are all to familiar as you know! Many hugs and prayers for your family tomorrow and in the coming days.

So glad you will have that masterpiece of art to display forever..something the two of them did together!

Thinking of u

OurLittleBlessingS said...

Your post brought tears to my eyes. What a beautiful post. You are so very blessed to be able to spend these few days with her and for Emersyn to get to have a few more days of fun with her. The pictures/memories are beautiful ones, and ones you'll treasure forever. I'll be sending prayers your way, hon.

Sherrie said...

Patti, your post made me cry. Grandparents are such a blessing and what a neat experience to have Ems spend time with her. It must be so hard to see her in such a fragile state...I will be thinking of you tomorrow-please let me know if you need anything. Such a good idea to save the canvas for her visit-Ems can hang that on her wall and you both will have something beautiful to remember :) -S

Emily C said...

Oh, Patti... What a sweet post! I want to wake Sadie up & put her in the car with paints & head over to my parents' house right now so she can paint with her Gigi. You are certainly in my prayers this week; how blessed you are to have been able to create such beautiful memories during this visit!

Sending you lots of hugs!

sister sheri said...

Praying for you, sweetie! I am so glad you had such an amazing and wonderfully memorable visit. What a gift! Much love to you.

OurLittleBlessingS said...

hey girl, i know you have a lot on your mind right now, when you have a sec-pop over to my blog-i have something for you!


Tiffany said...

Love you friend! What a precious project for them to do. See you in a few days!

Sarah said...

I'm praying for you, Sweet Friend. What an amazing Gigi you have and such special moments she has shared with you and Emersyn. That is such a blessing! I will be praying for you tomorrow. And, still say "see you later" - because, regardless of when it is - you WILL see her later. :)

Love you!!

Sue and Kevin said...

You are such a wonderful Daughter!
I LOVE you!!!!

Ann said...

Like your mom you are an amazing woman!!! And your Gigi is the foundation!!! Your daughter is GORGEOUS and I am so glad I recommended they come visit you!!! Your mom and your Gigi love you and your family so much and for you to spend this special time with them was a blessing from above.. I will pray that God will give you the strength and grace to endure that is happening..And be assured I will do whatever is in my power to make this journey for your mom and Gigi as smooth as possible.. Prayers and faith to you and your family...