Wednesday, March 31, 2010

Monday, March 29, 2010

Not Me Monday!

I haven't been as good at keeping track of my "Not Me Moments" as of late but here are a few that I could remember from the last week or so!

It wasn't ME that accidentally forgot to change my bra after working out in the morning before going to work. While washing my hands in the bathroom at work, I wasn't shocked to see that lovely uni-boob effect that only a sports bra can give you. Lovely.

Sometimes when the refrigerator is open, Emersyn likes to sit on the bottom ledge, sometimes without me noticing. Well, last week, I totally DIDN'T accidentally drop a large container of Feta cheese onto Emersyn's head as she sat below me! I was NOT totally thankful that her head broke the cheese container's fall, which saved most of the cheese except for the many pieces that happened to fall into her hair. And when she started hysterically crying, I did NOT run and grab my iPhone to take a picture while cracking up....that would be just awful, don't you think?!?!

Feta Head.
Also, this is NOT a picture of my daughter in Christmas jammies in March. Nope!


On Saturday, I felt a little domestic so I decided to let Emersyn and her baby come with me on a little walk to get the mail, along with Henry, the doggie that we watched over the weekend for some friends. Now, anyone with a toddler knows that walking any distance can take awhile. When we FINALLY got to the mailbox, all the sudden I realized that I had banana bread in the oven that I had let bake for just about another five minutes and I COMPLETELY forgot about it!!! Oh wait, I mean, I did NOT totally forget about it! :) At that point I did NOT pick up my daughter, her stroller and baby and the dog and run back to the house, where I did not leave the baby and stroller on the front porch much to my daughter's dismay. I managed to salvage the banana bread, and while taking it out of the oven, my daughter was NOT screaming hysterically at her baby who was sitting rather peacefully in her stroller outside. Oy.

On our walk. :) This is also the scene of the crime where I left her baby while I tended to my banana bread. :)

And finally, speaking of my daughter......while on a walk the other day Emersyn thought it was amusing to keep dropping things out of her stroller. While crossing TV Hwy, a MAJOR intersection, Emersyn did NOT proceed to drop her baby doll in amusement and unbeknownst to me. Then, it was not ME who was startled by five different cars that started honking at me in the intersection, pointing back at the sidewalk where Emersyn had dropped her baby. I did NOT have a total panic attack seeing as I am fearful of ALL major intersections after getting in my accident this past summer and these honking cars were NOT adding to the peace of my walk. And when I finally realized why they were honking, it wasn't MY face that turned bright RED and flushed with embarrassment. Needless to say, Emersyn did NOT get her baby for the rest of that walk!

Okay, that's enough Not Me fun for now. I am staying home with Emersyn today due to her having either severe allergies or a cold AGAIN.

P.S. I totally didn't take Emersyn to Starbucks this morning as a little treat for our sick day, ha ha!

Sunday, March 28, 2010

Sugar Sugar


Ever since I embarked on my healthy living pursuit, I have had so much fun discovering new blogs in addition to the ones I have been enjoying for awhile since becoming a mama. It is so nice to know that there are other ladies out there with the same struggles and desires. One of the blogs that I discovered via my BFF's blog is Melissa's! She has two, just like myself! Mrs. Married is devoted to her passion for her husband, life and theater and Try, Try Again is devoted to the quest towards healthy living and weight loss! I just adore her outlook on life and have loved getting to know her better via the blog world. I am sure if she lived nearby we would get together and burn some calories on a regular basis. After all, I don't do coffee dates anymore; it's all about burnin' calories on walks! :)

Yesterday Melissa "awarded" me the Sugar Doll award which was awfully nice of her, don't you agree?

The rules are:
1- thank the person who gave you the award
2- name five bloggers who make your life a little sweeter
3- tell why i was given this award
4- tell the nominees why you are giving them the award

Thank you Melissa!! Your blog posts are a highlight on my google reader and I so appreciate your optimistic outlook on life! I am so confident that 2010 is going to be an amazing year for us in getting healthy!!

Melissa's reason for giving me this award was this: "Patti is awesome. I love her blogs. Her first one is about family life & the Less is More one is her weightloss journey, which is inspiring & motivating me like crazy!! She is doing SO WELL on her journey & i really could take a few lessons from her (& i do!)." Thank you for such kind words Melissa!!

Because I am such a fan of encouraging others and words of affirmation, I am going to play along with the blog rules and tag five other bloggers that "sweeten" my life!! There are SO many more then just five but If I have to pick ONLY five, here are some of them......

1) Nicole @ Let Them Eat Lettuce- being a fellow NW girl, she too has to deal with trying to be active in a very damp and cold enviroment!! Yes, the Pacific Northwest is beautiful and has it's fair share of nice sunny days but we are also well known for our rainy days too. :) Nicole is a very positive and encouraging person who recently ran a 3.75 mile race, how amazing is that?!?!?! I love reading about her love for getting healthy, her husband and life in general!

2) Jenny @ The Cutest Adventure- Jenny will officially be my sister-in-law in less then 6 weeks! She is everything I hoped my brother would marry and more. I always knew that Brett and I would be close to David and his family, granted he married someone cool. Well, he is going to!! :) Emersyn just loves her Auntie and their upcoming wedding is going to be one of the happiest days of my life, I just know it.

3) Vanessa @ Everything She Knows- I am sooooo happy to have met Vanessa this last year! She is truly a kindred spirit, if that makes any sense. You know those people in life that you meet and feel like you have known them forever and you just GET each other?? Yeah....it's like that with Vanessa. :) She is beautiful, hysterical and has a sassy little 4 almost 5 year old that is a little firecracker, just like her mama. I love that Vanessa has a blog and I am totally jealous in awe of her writing abilities!!! She is witty and well spoken, such a great combo!

4) Melissa @ Paper, Stamps & Bows: Oh My! I have known Melissa for many years. She used to go to the same church that I do. She recently started up a card making business, in addition to juggling the responsibilities of being the mom of a three year old and almost one year old twins!! And I thought my life was crazy! :) Her cards are beautiful and you can tell that she puts a lot of love and thought into each project. If you are in need of handcrafted cards, she just started an Etsy store. I checked out some of her cards and they are very reasonable!! Stop by her blog and be inspired!

5) Kristi @ Stilettos & Flip Flops- Kristi was a student in youth group back when Brett and I were involved in that ministry. She has since grown up and turned into a lovely young woman. Don't I sound old just by saying that??! Ha ha. No really, she is in college now and even though I know life doesn't afford her much time to blog, I do enjoy reading her posts when she is able to get to it. Kristi is upbeat, loves the Lord and desires for Him to work in her life. It's so fun to read blogs of all different stages of life!

Yay for blog awards! :) Happy Sunday everyone!!

Wednesday, March 24, 2010

Monday, March 22, 2010

Friend Makin' Monday!


I haven't participated in a FMM in awhile but since today's questions are all about SPRING, I thought I would play along!

1. Favorite things about Spring: flowers, cherry blossom trees, sunshine filled days after the long long rainy winter, Easter, being able to leave the house without bundling up myself and my toddler....

2. What I'm doing for Spring Break: um...I am a grown up with no school aged children. Spring break is irrelevant to me except that my brother is staying with us for the week! He is getting married in May and I am savoring this special time in his life with him. Plus, him and my husband are best buds so it's like Brett gets to have a friend over and spend the night, hee hee. :)

3. Favorite Spring flower: I love tulips!!

4. Do you have a garden? I wish. :( I attempted to garden last year but it was a mega FAIL. Maybe someday....

5. If so, what do you grow? I did attempt to grow some tomatoes. I don't want to talk about it though....too traumatizing. *sniff sniff*

6. Do you do Spring cleaning? Yes! I love opening the windows and letting the fresh air in! It's hard to stay indoors during the nice weather though. We desperately need to clean out our guest room, especially since it is going to house the newlyweds for a couple months after their wedding! I'm really looking forward to free babysitting spending some quality time with them!!

7. What is your weather *really* like right now? It's actually pretty Spring-y! Right now the sun is shining and it's a cool 51 but feels nice in the sunshine.

8. Snapped any weather related photos lately? Here is a pic of Emersyn at the zoo last week!


9. What's your favorite thing to do on a sunny afternoon? Go on a walk, go to the zoo, go to the park! Any of those work! :)
10. Favorite TV show right now? Biggest Loser for sure! :) I also love Thursday night shows....Community, Parks & Rec, Office and 30 Rock. Hilarious.


Thursday, March 18, 2010

Thursday Tidbits

I went to check on Emersyn last night and out of no where she says, "apple" in her sleep. Too sweet. :)

It's been awhile since I posted some Thursday tidbits so I thought I would give it a go today....


*I'm super excited to go see Michael Buble in a couple weeks!!! He is just so stinkin' good looking talented!! Ha! :) Emersyn is going to have a sleepover at her Nana and Papa's; her third one!!


*I feel like my baby cravings have been quenched (for the time being) now that my BFF is pregnant. I am going to live vicariously through her for now!! Tomorrow I am going to visit a new baby though that was born yesterday. Hopefully that won't reignite any of those longings. :)


*Emersyn is ever changing and growing up right before my very eyes. Something that she has started to do which is just LOVELY is shrieking at other kids. She is so funny. I think she get's jealous or threatened. For example, at Trader Joes they have tiny shopping carts for the kids. See below:

Sorry the picture is so blurry but Emersyn is a speedy little shopper. Anyways, while in Trader Joes, we would encounter other kids pushing their own little mini shopping carts. Emersyn would leave her cart and go over to them and there cart and kind of shriek at them, almost like accusingly! I told her, "Emersyn, they have their own cart....come back and get your cart" but it was like this funny territorial thing. She was like that at the zoo today, if she was looking at an animal and another kid would come up next to her and look she would shriek like she was jealous they were there too, not because they were necessarily in her space. She has also kind of started pushing other kids. Not very often but the other night her and Estella, her little BFF, were playing on a slide together and Ems would get frustrated if Stella would just sit on the top of the slide and not go down and kind of push her. I think she is just learning how to communicate too but I hate the shrieking thing. She will also shriek at adults that say hi to her if she is in a bad mood or too tired. Oh man. The terrible two's have arrived early it seems. :)


I can't complain too much though. She is generally a very sweet and loving child. I think she is just developing a strong willed personality with really shouldn't surprise me too much seeing who her daddy parents are! :) Anyone else have experience with this type of territorial thing in their toddler?



*I have started going to the gym when I can after work. Not only do I get a chance to work out....I get a chance to READ!!! I have actually been enjoying my magazine subscriptions lately! I need to order the new Jodi Picoult book at the library now that I will have a chance to read it!

Happy Thursday everyone!

Tuesday, March 16, 2010

BEST NIGHT EVER!!!!

Soooo I have been waiting to share this until my BFF made the official announcement via Facebook and blogland......

The weekend before last, Tiffany came to town for a women's conference. I would have loved to go with her but since my own church's womens retreat was the weekend prior, I felt like it probably wasn't the wisest choice for my budget. :) The conference ended on Saturday afternoon and then her/our friend Molly dropped her off at my house. I was SO happy to have her all to myself for an evening. We only get to see each other a couple times a year which stinks now that we have little ones. :(

Emersyn was at her Nana's and Brett was still at work so we got to chat for a good hour or so before Brett and Emersyn got home. Tiffany shared with me all the things that she felt God was telling her and the things He had revealed to her at this women's conference and I was so happy for her. I know that she has wrestled with infertility and she really seemed at peace with the Lord's timing in everything. I knew that she was supposed to "start" over the weekend but she hadn't yet so she planned on taking a pregnancy test the next morning.

Brett and Ems got home, we ate dinner and then sat down to relax. Being the impatient one that I am, I said "why don't you just take the test now?". Tiffany looked skeptical because you really should take them first thing in the morning and I only had one test. I told her no worries, I would totally send Brett to the Dollar store if this one was negative. My husband looked thrilled at the prospect of going to the Dollar store to buy his wife's BFF a pregnancy test, ha! He would have though if I wanted him to, that is just how great he is. :)

I gave Tiffany a plastic cup, the pregnancy test, and told her to go give it her best shot. I was praying the whole time. I so didn't want her to be disappointed and I wondered if it was a bad idea having her take the test at night. I was waiting outside when I heard her washing her hands. "You're not waiting by yourself are you??!!?" I shouted. She opened the door. "Nothing yet", she said. I looked at that oh so familiar dollar store test. The one that told me a hundred times that I wasn't pregnant and the one that told me exactly three times that I was indeed pregnant. My heart sank. There was just one line. I went out of the bathroom where I noticed that Emersyn had climbed upstairs to see what we were up to. All of the sudden Tiffany says, "There is a LINE". I race back into the bathroom. Indeed there was a line. Kinda. It was like super super light. I was skeptical. Tiffany was not. She starts screaming and jumping. I start screaming and jumping. Emersyn starts screaming but not out of joy, it is out of terror!! I pick Emersyn up and race downstairs with the pee test in hand. I shove it in Brett's face. I am sure he is thrilled to have my friends pee stick in his face at this point but I demand that he look at it. He agrees that it is there but it is faint. Tiffany grabs her wallet and says we have to go get another test. I tried to run out the door but Brett insisted that I stay to calm Emersyn down. He thought it was traumatizing for her mama to be screaming and then run off and I agreed. After Emersyn calmed down, we headed to Walgreens. I was in a daze. Tiffany had waited for this for so long. Did I really get to witness this dream come true for her?? She grabbed a digital test and then we went back home for a repeat of the episode above, except this time there wasn't a faint line, only a very definite "pregnant" declaration, and there was more screaming from us and sadly, from Emersyn too. Tiffany handed over the other digital pregnancy test for me to use someday since she had two confirmed tests. It is sitting in my bathroom right now, probably freaking my husband out, ha! :)

So what do you do when you find out your best friend is pregnant? You take her shopping!!! :) We went to Target and then Kohls to find a "Big Brother" t-shirt. Tiffany wrestled with not telling her husband until she got home but she asked Brett which he would have preferred and he said he would rather be told in person. We found the perfect shirt at Kohls and I can't wait to see pictures of Riley in it, holding his baby brother/sister.

Lou, thank you for getting pregnant at just the right time so that I could witness such a special event with you!!! Praying that God will bless this pregnancy and give you lots of energy.....you're gonna need it!!!

Monday, March 15, 2010

Monday Monday!

Happy Monday friends! I posted some links & pictures of a couple recipes that I made over the weekend on my other blog. I felt so domestic, my heart nearly burst with pride. :) I totally took like 25 pictures of my creations, ha ha!


Also, I have been neglecting my memory verse project for the year! I am still working on the last one but it is now in my iPhone and that will make it much easier to remember. We went to church last night and I was praying all day that the Lord would give me a verse to memorize that had meaning for this time in my life. Last night Pastor Caleb shared a great message and it included this verse:


"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened and I will give you rest. Take my yoke uponyou and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart and you will find rest for your souls, for my yoke is easy and my burden is light." Matthew 11:28-30


Such a great verse. I think that sometimes I grow weary in thinking about how dreams, goals, etc. will ever be fulfilled. That isn't for me to worry about. I fully believe that the Lord does not intend for us to go through this life stressed out. In fact, I believe as Christians that we are called to be different and set apart in this world. We live in a culture that strives on busyness and stress. I heard a message once that stayed with me forever.....let's set ourselves apart by NOT worrying and NOT stressing. Had I not married my husband, I think I *might* have turned out to be a rather high strung person. Brett totally mellowed me out and for that I am grateful. I long to be the kind of woman, wife and mother that doesn't burden my friends and family with my stresses or worries. I think it is so refreshing to be around people that truly trust in the Lord and don't let the cares of this world weigh them down. Worry, in a sense, is like a slap in the face to the Lord. It's like saying He isn't big enough for our problems. I don't want to be like that.

I was working on my Bible Study last night and came across this statement....

"Faith is like a muscle, it grows with use and atrophies if it is not used. Faith is not a feeling, it is an often made choice- it is the decision to take God at His word and place more value on what He says than how things look from where we sit."

Faith is like a muscle....interesting to think about. :)

Friday, March 12, 2010

5 Question Friday

My Little Life

I haven't participated in a Five Question Friday for a long time but when I saw question number 5, I just knew I had to play along this week!! :)

Thanks to Mama M. for hosting 5QF every week!

Shall we begin?

1. How much time do you spend on the computer a day? Hmm...it depends! On days that I work, I try not to be on the computer very much at home because I am on it for 5 hours at work. I do check in with my blogger friends in the mornings for maybe 20 minutes or so while I eat breakfast if Emersyn is playing happily. Now that I have my iPhone I have to be really careful to limit my computer time. Sometimes Brett will be on the laptop all night and I will be on my phone and at the end of the night, I just feel kinda icky like I wasted a ton of time. As the weather gets nicer, I am hoping to enjoy my mornings with Emersyn being active rather then inside on the computer!

2. Will you pay for your children's college or raise them to pay for their own way? I hope to do a little of both honestly. I hope that my children make practical choices in regards to which schools they attend and then I hope to be able to assist them while encouraging them to pay for themselves too. I think that if you pay for school entirely, they might not totally appreciate school and work as hard as if they were paying themselves. On the other hand, I think that if you don't help in anyway, you set them up for failure too. I personally moved out and got my own apartment at age 18 and never went to school because the overhead of paying for my own lifestyle caused me to work a ton and not have time for school. I want to do everything I can to make sure my children get their degrees right out of high school. This is something both my husband and I regret not doing!

3. Have you ever been in a car accident? Yes. I rear ended a lady when I was 17 but it wasn't too bad. Brett hit a guy in our apartment complex who cut a corner and came out of nowhere and that damage was pretty bad but that is a cool story I will save for another day. :) Then I was hit this last summer by a lady who ran a red light. See that story and pictures here.

4. What is your favorite book? Hmm....my favorite fiction book would have to be "My Sister's Keeper" by Jodi Picoult. I like pretty much anything that she writes. My favorite non-fiction book would have to be "Anonymous" by Alicia Britt Chole.

5. Do you make your bed everyday? YES I DO!!!!!! I can say that for the first time in my entire life!! I totally deep cleaned our room before a date night (wink wink) a couple weeks ago and we have made our bed every day since. It will be three weeks tomorrow!!! There's something about going in my room during the day and seeing the nicely made bed that brings me joy!

Wednesday, March 10, 2010

Wordless Wednesdays- Naughty and she knows it!

(She just loves to tear apart the entire kitchen while I am trying to clean it. I loved her face in this picture.....)


Tuesday, March 9, 2010

Speaking of transparency.... :)




I consider myself to be a pretty positive person. I truly find joy in the little things in life and count myself as incredibly blessed.

However.

Today I am having a blah day.

Ever have those? I am not one to dwell on negative things, especially on my blog, but in the spirit of transparency I thought I might share what was on my heart.

Having a sick daughter has really been draining. Not to sound selfish but as a mother, it is so hard to hear your baby girl coughing through the monitor and realize that there isn't anything I can do to help her. She is definitely on the mend but because she has been sick, I have been homebound on my days off and missing my church family on Sundays and Tuesdays. Emersyn misses her friends too, I can tell. So anyways, that kind of put a damper to the start of my week. (Okay, after writing this whole post I re-read this I totally thought of mothers out there with terminally ill children and felt sick for being so selfish but again, trying to be transparent and this is/was how I am feeling. Thank you Lord that the extent of Emersyn's sickness is just a cold though.)

I got a call from my husband yesterday and to keep a loooong story short, it's not looking like he will be getting a promotion as soon as I thought he might. I had my hopes set really high that a promotion for him was right around the corner which would mean I could stay home with Emersyn, etc. That kind of bummed me out.

I had a conversation with someone close to me yesterday that resulted in me writing an email that I didn't want to write but felt I needed to in order to set some boundaries. (How's that for vague? Ha...that's all that needs to be said about that matter though.) That kind of bummed me out.

I was doing so good with working out and not letting the circumstances of life discourage me from putting my health first and I feel like I am just lacking energy and motivation. (I'm still eating good though).

Sometimes I feel like the Lord wants to remind me that His grace is sufficient for me. I think that I get caught up in my own little world and I think that often times my joy is contingent on things going my way. I have been hoping/expecting for Brett to get promoted any day due to a series of events that seemed to point in that direction. It could still happen at anytime but yesterday's call seemed like more of a step back then a step forward. My husband is a hard worker and sometimes I feel like hard workers get taken advantage of. *Side note: Brett is SO blessed to have a wonderful job and I truly truly am so grateful for it.

I often try to encourage my friends that are longing for husbands or babies in a wise manner that God's timing is truly the best. I am not so good at following my own advice sometimes. The Lord wants me to slow down sometimes and readjust my focus. I need to continually be going to Him as my first AND last resort. Sometimes I feel like when life is going great I will occasionally check in with the Lord, give Him a high five and say "thanks for all the blessings...I'll let you know when I need ya". I love the Lord with all my heart and I get choked up just beginning to think of all the blessings that I do have. But sometimes I need to be better at trusting.

My sweet little naughty toddler is a constant reminder of the Lord's love for me. We start out most of our mornings with oatmeal that I lovingly make from scratch microwave for 30 seconds. When we come downstairs I set Emersyn down and tell her that I am going to make her oatmeal. 99% of the time she starts to whine and claw at my legs. "Emersyn, I making your oatmeal as fast as I can" I tell her. Then comes the alligator tears. I pick her up, kiss her on the cheek and show her the oatmeal that is in the microwave cooking. "See honey, it's almost done....trust Mama". I set Emersyn down, take out the microwaved oatmeal and head towards the freezer for some frozen blueberries. Meanwhile, Emersyn starts panicking, reaching up to the counters for her boiling hot oatmeal that still needs a minute or two to cook. "Emersyn, it's not ready yet....almost though". Then I stir it up and again, Emersyn is going nuts, reaching for the oatmeal. "Emersyn, let Mama add some blueberries first.....it will make it taste yummier and then it won't burn your little mouth, just be patient....". This whole process literally takes like three minutes. It might even go quicker if not for the little monkey clawing at my legs.

Sometimes I feel like Emersyn and her oatmeal with the Lord. I so badly want things NOW. I often will show Emersyn the packet of raw oatmeal and ask if she wants to just eat it like it is. It is quicker and frankly, much less work for me! She probably would say yes because she doesn't know any better but that is why she has me. Because I know that oatmeal that is cooked and prepared is so much better then raw uncooked oatmeal and thus, worth the wait.

I bet our years seems like minutes to the Lord. He can see the future and He knows how good the "oatmeal" He is preparing for us is going to be. It's going to taste delicious and be satisfying. Just like Emersyn needs to trust me, I need to trust Him. And you know what? I SO should. Just like I have proven to Emersyn for the last 18 months that I indeed WILL feed her breakfast if she just gives me a chance, the Lord has proven to me over the last 29 years that He WILL provide for my needs beyond my wildest dreams or expectations if I will just let Him.

Lord, I'm sorry for whining and not letting you finish making my oatmeal sometimes. Help me be patient and trust you, no matter what the circumstances are or when things seemingly aren't going my way. I don't want raw uncoooked oatmeal in my life. I want it to be cooked to perfection. And I'm even willing to wait for you to add the blueberries too. :)

Thanks for letting me share friends. Do you ever get impatient for oatmeal? Ha ha, you know what I mean...... ;)

Monday, March 8, 2010

Blog Button

Okay, I am SO not tech savvy. My lovely blog design was done by a bloggy friend who is far more talented then I. I am itchin' for a new look but am intimidated to try to figure it out on my own.

I was inspired, however, by ANOTHER blog friend (Melissa) who said that making a blog button was pretty simple. Check out her post here!

I decided to try it. I was sitting next to my husband on our couch with the laptop and I heard him chuckle as I told him what I was about to attempt. He knows that for one, I am not tech savvy. And for two, I am not patient which is something you kind of need to be with attempting new things. But if you look to the right of my page, you will see it was a success!! This is one of my favorite all time pictures of Emersyn and I think it embodies her personality perfectly. :)

Thanks for passing on the simple tips and link to instructions Melissa!

Perhaps one of these days I will venture into changing my blog look.....we'll see.

Sunday, March 7, 2010

The Blessing of Transparency

Last weekend I went to the Heathman Lodge in Vancouver, WA (about 35 minutes from my house) for our church's women's retreat. I was really excited to getaway and have some time to refocus! My roomie ended up getting sick and had to back out at the last minute. I was okay with that, I told the Lord that if He wanted me to Himself that weekend, that was fine with me. Instead though, He arranged for another friend to stay in my room with me and it was wonderful!

The theme of the week was renewing and renovating ourselves. Our Pastor's wife was the speaker and I totally dig her style; I very much an engaged the entire time she speaks and that says a lot for a normally pretty easily distractible kind of girl. :)

As Linda, our speaker, shared her heart I was so moved by her transparency. She shared a testimony of God's faithfulness in her family's life and like most testimony's, it started with a tragedy of sorts. Not a death or anything, but just a series of events that that turned her world upside down. As I sat there, with tears streaming down my face, I was so challenged. I leaned over to my friend and whispered, "we are all just a bunch of fakers". It's so true sometimes. I feel like so often we as women pretend to have it all together, pretend that our marriages are perfect, our children are obedient, and that we have everything under control.

This past summer, I feel like I went through a series of events in my own life (blogged about here and here) that left me so stripped that transparency was inevitable. And for those events, I am grateful. As painful as it was, it was so worth it. I am a better person for it. I got to a place in my life where I had been so rejected by others that I decided that I just didn't care anymore about what they thought. I had this precious baby girl and an amazing husband. That was enough for me. Just before and during much of my pregnancy, I feel like I became a little secluded, a little anti-social and really let my insecurities take over. After going through a refining time this summer, I decided to step out and really stop letting the devil hold me back from living up to my full potential. I think I always thought in my mind that *someday* when I lose weight, THEN I will be more involved and have more friends and people will like me more. Or someday when Brett doesn't work weekends and we have a more *normal* life. I decided to start investing in friendships that were mutually beneficial, surround myself with women who aspired to be great wives and mothers and loved the Lord. I also decided that 2010 was the year that I was FINALLY going to get healthy. I really felt on my heart that I needed to be transparent in this issue so I started a blog about it! It has been SO freeing for me, I can't even tell you. I have had so many people encourage me and even say that I inspired them to start working out or getting healthier which is CRAZY to hear.

As our Pastor's wife wept and shared her heart, I was filled with so much admiration for her. The more I learned about her faults and failures, the more I related to her and felt like I could learn SO much from her. Another good friend of mine shared this weekend as well and it was the same thing when she spoke; I was filled with so much admiration and respect. I think sometimes that we feel that if we get too *real* in life, people are going to judge us, think less of us, etc. Well, some people probably are. TOO BAD FOR THEM! I have found transparency to be freeing; fakin' your way through life is exhausting in my opinion.

I believe that us women need to be here for each other and stop judging each other. Instead of being quick to judge and gossip we need to pray for each other, offer support and spur each other on towards becoming better women.

Can't wait for next year's retreat! :)

Thursday, March 4, 2010

P I C K Y

My darling 18 month old Emersyn has decided to enter the rankings of picky toddler eaters! I am in such a rut with her. Last night I decided to mix things up a bit and made her a grilled cheese, don't think she has ever had one before. I know she doesn't like cheese but I thought it might be different if I melted it. She was totally disgusted with it and picked off all the cheese on the edges and dropped them onto the floor. Meanwhile, her starving and dieting mama was drooling nearby. What I wouldn't give for a grilled cheese!! :)

Emersyn's favorite food by far is almond butter and jelly sandwiches. She will eat those right up, no problem. She likes mac and cheese; I make the organic Trader Joe's or Annie's brand and toss some peas into it. She used to eat the peas right up but lately she has started picking just the pasta out. She LOVES mandarin oranges, pomegranate (her FAVORITE), Trader Joe organic spaghetti o's, spaghetti, avocado, beans, bagels, yogurt, waffles, pretzels, kids Clif bars, applesauce, bananas (sometimes).....no real green veggies except for peas (sometimes) and zucchini (when she's is the mood).

I just don't feel like she has a good variety. We are really adamant about not feeding her anything breaded. I am more willing to try different things but Brett really wants her to eat as whole as possible, which I definitely think is a great goal. Sometimes I just wish I had more things to offer her, especially more things that she can feed herself which might sound selfish but when she can feed herself, it buys me SO much time. She won't eat cheese, period. Such a bummer. She doesn't like chicken unless it is disguised in a bite with pasta. I did feed her some steak last night and she did like that. She didn't like scrambled eggs the last time that I fed them to her but that was awhile ago, I should try again. She doesn't like lunch meat. I have made her veggie corn dogs and she didn't love those either, nor did she like the soy hot dogs.

Any ideas mamas? :) This isn't something I am *worried* about, just looking for more variety for my baby girl.

She is on the mend from her cold but has developed a dry cough, which is just heart breaking over the baby monitor. Hopefully she's feeling better this weekend. :)



Monday, March 1, 2010

Round TWO

Ugh. Emersyn is now going through round two of an awful cold. I hate it when she is sick, it is the most helpless feeling as a mama. It seems like MOST people I know are either sick or have sick kids so I guess it was inevitable, despite my best efforts to try to protect her from as many germs as possible.

Oy.

I am sick too and am feeling sooooo tired. But not for the same reason that my friend LeAnna is tired. Or my friend Rachelle. I am tired because Emersyn has woken up at 5am for the last two days. Yesterday she wouldn't go back down. Today she did but I was so stressed about her getting up so early that I had trouble falling back asleep. I am staying home from work today and looking forward to nap time. I too plan on snoozin'.

I went with my future sister-in-law and her twin sister and mom to try on wedding dresses. I LOVE the one that she picked, she is going to look stunning in it and I am so excited for their big day in May. It will be here before we know it.

I had such a great time at the women's retreat this weekend. More on that later. My brain is too fried to discuss anything significant at this time. :)

Happy Monday!