Tuesday, July 13, 2010

How to Win Your Man by Emersyn- Volume 2

Hi ladies. It's me again, Emersyn. Remember last year when Riley came to visit me and I gave you all some pointers? Well, it's that time again! Watch and learn friends....by the end of the week Riley was wrapped around my little finger.

First off, a man likes a woman who isn't afraid to dress up for the occasion. This is me on the 4th of July, seriously rockin' a sailor outfit, complete with an American Flag that my mom gave me to carry around. I could tell that Riley was impressed with my patriotism, as well as my use of red white and blue on America's birthday.

This is Riley and I at the Children's Museum in Portland. Even though I know the area much better then he does (considering I am the Portland native and he is NOT), I decided to let him drive. Men like to feel in control. I let him feel like he was in control, even though I sat so close to him that I could knock him out of the way if we got lost.

This is Riley and I feeding the ducks on the third day he was in town. Riley grabbed my hand to show affection but I did what any respectable girl does.....

I played hard to get! Like I said, this was only day three of his trip. I didn't want him to get the wrong impression of me. I don't hold hands until at least the 4th or 5th day....it's just how my parents have raised me. I did appreciate Riley initiating the affection though. That's really the key ladies, let them come to you...

This picture is funny for a couple reasons. I take after my mother in many ways. One of the ways I take after her is that I don't love sitting on the couch and watching movies. I have to be in the mood. Clearly, I was not in the mood to watch a movie which is what is happening in this picture. But, I am a giver. Look at Riley's face! Clearly, he is thrilled. If I want him to play "cook" with me in the kitchen, I need to be willing to watch "Monsters, Inc." an indefinite amount of times. Give and take, two important elements in a successful relationship.

Riley and I decided to have some fun with my new water table this past week. Note how I gently have my hand on his back for this photo op. I didn't want to overwhelm him into thinking that just because we are playing with the water table, that means we will be for sure getting married. (Even though we totally will..shhh.) Sometimes men freak out at situations that look more committing then they are.

This is me attempting to climb into my water table. Do I really think I can get into this small of an item? NO. Am I giving Riley the opportunity to feel needed and appreciated? YES.

I do feel that Riley took advantage of this situation just a tad. I'm not sure it was neccesary to grab my tush to help me out but I appreciated the help none the less. Side note: don't my calf muscles look awesome?! I've been doing the Shred when my mom's not lookin'...Lord knows SOMEONE in our house needs to work out more. I am hoping to inspire her.

Here is Riley and I playing with my new eggs. I sat close enough so our legs were touching but not to where I was in his lap. Nice and subtle.

Even though these were MY new eggs, I let Riley play with them. Again, like my mom, I am a giver!

**Disclaimer: My mommy said that the next part of my little advice post shouldn't be taken literally by you ladies. She doesn't think that bathing with a man is the best way to get him, at least not in a decent moral way. But since I am little and Riley is little, she said it was okay**

Here is Riley washing my back. My back wasn't really dirty but instead of raining on his parade, I just let him feel needed again.

Riley really likes trucks. Here is me showing my enthusiasm for them!

A gentle touch on the knee is always a hit.

And finally, two days before Riley left to go home, I let him seal the deal with a kiss! See...all my hard work paid off! This picture will be featured on our wedding program, FYI. My mom is a planner like that.

Good luck gettin' your men ladies! Take my advice...it works!!!!!


Jules said...

Absolutely adorable....I loved every one, especially the grabbing the tush one.

Mandy said...

You are a kick. And so smart.
And you're mommy isn't a bad writer either. :)
So funny, Patti!
Thanks for the laughs!

Roxanne Schultz said...

This is way too precious and cute!

Matt and Melissa said...

Oh my goodness Patti you are such an amazing writer. I was laughing so hard. That was just too cute!

Sue and Kevin said...


LeAnna said...

LoL! This was just way too cute!!!

Dara Wills said...

Seriously one of the best posts ever!! Those two are sure cute.

sister sheri said...

Patti... I mean, Emersyn, you are TOO funny. Too funny, right?